What a Girl Wants, What a Girl Needs

First of all, I haven't blogged in nine months...truth.  Umm, life happened.  Nuff said.  Moving on.

Second of all, I aplogize for getting Christina Aguilera in your head, but admit it...you kind of love it.  Go on, I'll give you a quick second...get your Christina on...okay, now, here we go.

Recently, the most totally amazing, wonderful thing in perhaps the  history of the whole world my mommyhood happened.

I went on two, count them, TWO double dates in two weeks.  I know, right???  All I've got to say is that I've got the best, best momma in the whole wide world.

Now, before anyone calls the villagers with the pitchforks and the torches, I'm a good mom, no a great mom.  I LOVE my daughter, more than anything in the whole world.  See?

 Sigh, those eyes! 

Mommy and her girl.

 Can you believe we got to do this in January...in INDIANA?!?!?!

I can't remember what she did...but she cracks me up.

So like I was saying, two double dates, in two weeks!!!!!!  I definitely need to commemorate this occasion, since it has literally been FIVE YEARS since our last double date with our fave friends.  I wish I had taken a picture because it felt like spotting a giant panda, rare, beautiful, and I may never see it again.  Double date number one:  dinner and a movie...a movie that was NOT animated, had NO singing, and did NOT star talking mice, fish, monkeys, or tiny blue creatures.  I know, we're totally living the dream, people.

I've always secretly kind of liked Friday night dinner with our big crazy tribe.  There are lots of laughs (our husbands are pretty much hilarious, and they've passed this on to our kids), lots of noise (a five year old, a three year old, and Miss Allie, for reals, yo), and lots of love.  It made my life feel full, overflowing with the blessings of my friends and my precious little family.  Yeah, waitresses might roll their eyes at us.  And yes, I know the cute girl on a date with her boyfriend is giving my noisy baby stink-eye, but she'll get hers someday when she has a baby.

But guys, as I sat there, with the man that used to be my boyfriend, and friends that we've loved from a time when none of our babies had been dreamt of yet, I got a little misty-eyed.  I remembered the young, cute kids we started out together as.  As our boys wisecracked, and we talked about things *gasp* other than our babies, I felt a total sense of me-ness wash over me.  I remembered the girl that I used to be.  Not the mom or the teacher, and guys, I missed her.  I've been trying so hard for the past few months to be an awesome teacher, and then feel guilty as I race to pick up my girl and try to be the best mom, that I literally hadn't thought about me at all.  I got a little bit teary (cuz I'm an emotional girl like that.  And while I used to feel horribly guilty about leaving Allie to go on dates, I realized when I came home that this is something I need to do every once in awhile.  Because the girl I remembered how to be, she rocks, and she's an even better mom having taken a couple hours for herself, you know?

On the way home from the second double date, I talked to my best friend about a book she is reading about how to be a happy mom.  And basically the book says that the happiest moms are living their passions.  They have something in their life that they do outside of their kids because they need to, they love it.  And you know what?  Their kids respect them and love them even more for it.  So, I decided I need to figure out how in middle of being a rockstar mom, a smokin' hot wife, and a Ms. Frizzle teacher to carve out time to start living my passions again.  Do I know how to do this yet?  Hell, no.  But I'm working on it.  And I'll keep you updated.  Because it's what I want, and what I need.